the delights of living in the present moment

It's been a long day filled with lots of errands, but funnily a lot of work also got done in the broken fragments of time I managed to get. Some days are like this. The days that are like this are the ones in which I'm only present with the task on hand, and not thinking about what's yet to come.

Oh, how many years of my life have I lived worrying about what's to come in the future, often a very distant future!

Growing up, there was always the idea of a distant future where problems would cease to exist and life would become 'easy'. Most everyone around me — mostly the adults, I suppose — was either looking forward to something in the future or was worried about what was to come.

And perhaps it is a nod to the rather good and stable childhood that I had that I could easily believe in a good and stable future too.

All that changed when I became a mother. The future was suddenly quite unpredictable. The present, even more so. Because everything was changing all the time. D was growing far too quickly, and we had to make quick decisions about where he'd go to school, which city we ought to move to so that he can attend a good school ... we were so caught up in all that future planning that is shoved down every parent's throat.

Even now, there are parents who have already registered their children in summer camps and have their entire summer schedule ready. And it's only March.

And here, in our household, we're taking a deliberately slower approach. For instance, registrations have already opened up for tennis lessons in May, but we've decided to wait until April-end for D to decide whether he'd like to take lessons or not. If he does, we'll look to register him then. If the spots are sold out, so be it.

We refuse to be sucked into this madness of planning everything several months in advance.

There are some exceptions, of course. For instance, registration for ski lessons in Jan-Mar open up the previous August. But D loves to go skiing, so that's a no-brainer and we sign up as soon as registration is open.

Skating was a different story last year. Registration opened in August and we signed up, but when October came around, D was in two minds. We kept a lot of options open, and he chose to try a class or two and see if he'd like to proceed. After the second week of lessons he decided he'd like to continue through the season. When lessons got over, he also decided that he wouldn't like to continue with skating lessons next year, an idea we are completely OK with.

It's great for children to be able to explore. To try something, then decide against it, then perhaps decide to take it up again somewhere down the line, or perhaps not.

I don't know about other parents, but as a parent I definitely have a hard time trying to plan D's life so far out in advance. I just think it's foolish to try and control their futures so much.

Last year, a parent told me that a mom was so desperate for her son to join Rep Basketball that she changed his date of birth on the registration form in order to make him eligible to sign up. And guess how old he was? Just a few months shy of the required age of 8 years!

Yes. The 'catch them early' bug has definitely caught most parents.

One of the troubles of trying to live consciously is that we'll often come up against the rest of the world flowing in a counter-current fashion. That makes us question everything we think we know about life, about ourselves, about the world around us.

Which is why I love coming back to the saying, Make a choice, and make it the right one.

We've chosen for D to have a slow, relaxed and unhurried pace of childhood. I've chosen to spend time with him, as much time as I can. This is something that is working for us at the moment.

And the funny part is, when I'm not always looking at the next task on hand to be completed or the distant future to be planned for, my present days are full yet relaxed, bustling and also energizing.

Who knows what the future holds? Who can possibly tell? Why not focus on the present moment instead? It truly has everything we need in this hour. And that is a matter of such privilege, we must consider ourselves very fortunate indeed.