tales for dreamers: a promising career as a pirate

The pirates are recruiting.

They are looking for story-tellers, magicians, flame-throwers, illusionists, rainbow-makers, dream-weavers, mermaid-spotters and the like who can regale and entertain the pirates when they settle down amid their treasure chests guzzling bottles of rum after a long hard day at work.

Applications are invited from anyone who can take figments of their imagination and convert them into reality.

Prior expertise is not a requirement but candidates must exhibit a keen desire to learn and perform; the best candidates are usually the ones who are not embarrassed to make mistakes and be mocked at.

Interested candidates are to address their applications to the pirates’ ship, Moonbeam Warrior, and successfully complete a series of tasks before they are called for an interview.

*(Finding where the ship is located is the first task.)

Your remuneration will comprise half a treasure map, bottles of rum, coins of gold and silver (sometimes these may be fake as a testimony to your performance or lack of it), more bottles of rum, cigars, and the luxury of nights spent under the stars ; there is no such thing as health insurance, and God forbid, should you fall seasick, you will be tossed overboard without a second thought, so consider yourself warned.

The more creative your application, the better your chances at being recruited, but the pirates are obviously not equal opportunity employers; the best job always goes to the one who supplies them with an endless stash of rum.

The deadline for applications was a century ago, but as with every other rule, this too can be bent with a crate or two full of their liquor of choice.

*(Psst! Moonbeam Warrior, docked at the harbour, is hidden in plain sight; but busy drivers on the adjacent highway easily mistake her proud, rusty masts for worn-out streetlight poles.)